The workplace is a pretty strange world in itself.
It isn’t your regular college class or fun hangout with friends. It is one place where you precariously take your steps forward and think strictly more than once before saying something.
You can be a certified G in real life but at office you are another one of those formal wearing, polite speaking, loved-by-all person.
The fun part about every office conversation is that you would want to say something to rip apart the other person but end up clocking it with a polite version (because you’re bred to do that).
For once, let’s let loose and get to know the real meanings behind those seemingly nice and sweet office talks.
1. “I can’t wait to get started!” – I actually can, but everyone has to say this, right?
2. “Hey there! Just wanted to follow up” – Why the F have you not responded to my last note.
3. “I’ll take your ideas on board” – I’ll steal your ideas and take credit for them.
4. “Let’s circle back on this” – I can’t deal with your bullshit right now.
5. “I’m working from home today” – I’m not doing any work today.
6. “I can’t help with this at the moment, but I’ll let you know if anything comes up!” – Already forgotten what you were asking me.
7. “Pub after work? Can’t, I’ve got plans I’m afraid” – I’ve spent quite enough time with you people for one day.
8. “Have you got a minute?” – You’ve got a minute.
9. “Please advise” – No really. For Christ’s sake help me now!
10. “Thanks so much for your understanding” – You’re going to be super pissed off. But we are cool since I asked you nicely.
11. “Can I have a quick word?” – I don’t have anything to discuss, I just like putting the fear of God into you.
12. “MORNING TEAM!” – Everyone hates me.
12. “I’ve been recently reading the biography of Steve Jobs” – I am not Steve Jobs and never will be.
14.“Great! (1 exclamation point)” – Sure, whatever.
15. “Great. (no exclamation points)” – I hate you.
Now you know the drill, don’t ya?! 😉